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Allow Yourself to Start Over

Many of us feel stuck in the wrong job, relationship, or lifestyle because we fear that if we try something different, it will lead to even worse results.

This attitude prevents us from finding what’s best for us, but it’s also a significant cause of stress and anxiety.

“If you’re not allowed to fail, how are you ever going to learn how to succeed?”  – John Wheeler

Instead of staying bogged down by how things turned out in the past, allow yourself to reset and begin anew!

Stop the Blame Game

The first step is to stop blaming yourself (or anyone else) for how your life has turned out so far—for all those things you wish were different.

Instead, acknowledge all that is good and right about your life now.

Learn to embrace the positive by practicing gratitude. And release the negativity, so it no longer holds you back.

Learning to let go of the past, whether mistakes, anger, sadness, embarrassment, or regrets, is crucial in moving on to something better.

Become more aware of your present and embrace what is before you instead of what’s behind you.

“The past is a place of reference, not a place of residence; the past is a place of learning, not a place of living.”    — Denis Waitley

smiling black female looking at camera while sitting at a desk

Hitting the Reset Button

Once you let go of the past, you can make a fresh start.

Allow yourself to be open to new possibilities, and don’t let your past dictate your future.

“If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things.”  – Albert Einstein

You might need to spend time thinking about how you’re going to do this in a balanced way that works for you.

Take your time and allow yourself to start over whenever and however it feels right for you.

Here are some ideas of how you can begin:

1. Change how you think about how things turned out.

And look for ways you can use what you’ve learned along the way to ensure better results in the future.

Instead of thinking, “I failed,” or “I made a terrible decision,” and then beating yourself up, acknowledge:

  • “I’m doing the best I can.”
  • “I made the best decision I could with the information I had.”
  • “Things didn’t happen as I had planned, but that’s okay. I’m okay.”
  • “Mistakes were made, and here is what I learned from them.”

2. Ask yourself how you can use what you’ve learned from your past to get you where you want to be in the future.

  • “What did I learn from that experience?”
  • “What could I have done differently?
  • “How can I apply what I learned to ensure a better outcome this time?”

3. Visualize what success looks like for you, and take small steps each day to get closer to that vision.

  • Picture yourself already in possession of the thing you desire. See it, feel it, believe in it.
  • Create a vision board for a constant visual reminder
  • Develop a daily mantra to help shift your mindset

4. Start making different choices that are more in line with how you want your life to look and feel. 

This may mean making some tough decisions, such as leaving a job or relationship that’s no longer serving you.

5. Focus on your goals, and let go of the need to control how things play out. 

Have faith that if you keep moving in the right direction, things will work out as they’re supposed to.

6. Release the need to be perfect, and permit yourself to make mistakes.  

Cut yourself some slack; you’re human-and trying, failing, and getting back up to try again is how you learn and grow.

7. Spend time doing something that makes your heart sing.

This positive energy spills over into other parts of your life!

8. Learn to lean into your intuition.

Trust that it will guide you to making the best decisions for your life.

9. Connect with supportive people.

They will encourage you to pursue your dreams and help you overcome the challenges you’ll face.

10. Remember, you’re the only one who can decide how your life turns out.

So, if you’re not happy with how things are going, you can choose to hit reset, make adjustments, and create the life you want.

The Future Awaits You

Allow yourself a new beginning, learn how to handle things differently, and make room for more joy and fulfillment in all areas of your life.

You have nothing to lose by taking a new path and everything to gain from living a more fulfilling life.

The universe has a funny way of working things out when we allow ourselves to close one door and open another, or another still.

But it’s up to you to enjoy the journey!

Next: The Art of Believing in You: Building Confidence

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One Comment

  1. I just finished reading Getting to Yes with Yourself by William Ury, so this post couldn’t be more timely! Very good points on all fronts, especially dropping the blame game, doing things that make your heart sing and just setting aside time to visualize what you want your life to look like.

    FI may be the goal however the journey matters just as much, and when we get to reset or start over, we can find that our route may have changed, but it’s now shorter.

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